Couch Watch: Day Four

It is now four days since I’ve been basically couch bound and I’m starting to develop a small case of cabin fever. I mean, I’ve worn the same pair of grey sweatpants for four days straight now and I think that our sofa is starting to develop a Hope-sized indentation from me lying on it for 10 hours a day. 

Yes, like Homer Simpson, I now have my own ass groove. 

Also? Kristian bought chocolate truffles. And they’re fifty calories each. And there is nobody here to make me stop eating them. Except for me, myself and I. And we all know how much willpower I have when it comes to chocolate truffles (answer: none). Truffles + lying on the couch every day = OMG I think my ass groove is getting bigger.

My biggest foray out into the real world was to walk to the end of our block wearing the aforementioned sweatpants and a pair of Kristian’s clogs in order to mail off a check with all of our monies to the City of Malden. Damn them and their making us pay taxes. I liked it much better when they forgot to send us a tax bill and we, in turn, forgot that they should probably have sent us a tax bill. This whole “two quarters worth of taxes on one VERY BIG BILL thing” is so not my bag. On a positive note, our water bill somehow manages to be negative every month, something that I don’t plan on complaining about anytime soon.

I should be enjoying some quality time spent watching TV, but I finally decided to let myself watch Firefly and so it’s really pleasure missed with a whole bunch of pain. Because, holy crap, this show is good and so I enjoy watching it but, also? There are only fourteen episodes! And I’ve already seen seven! That’s half! 

(I know math)

Every episode I watch brings me that much closer to there being no more episodes. Which makes me sad. Which requires more truffles. Which just contributes more to my ass groove.

It’s a vicious cycle, people, and I can’t break it.

Please, someone, send Zicam.

Or some horse tranquilizers.