Have I mentioned what an awesome dad my husband is? Because, daaaamn.
For Mother’s Day, all I wanted was to go to yoga and get a pedicure. Kristian? For Father’s Day? Asked for some time to himself…
… To do yard work. And catch up on some home improvement projects. Because he is totally a better human being than me.
(Damn his eyes.)
(His handsome, handsome eyes.)
The Saturday of Father’s Day weekend, I got up with Lilian, heated some milk up for her, and then we got back into bed with Kristian. We had a nice snuggle, the three of us and about a half dozen of her favorite stuffed animals. It was a nice, lovely moment of family bliss. And then…
Spoilered for the squeamish, because this is freaking nasty.
[spoiler]She turned her head and puked. Right into my open mouth.[/spoiler]
I’d like to say that I handled this with grace and aplomb. With class and dignity. With love and compassion. But what I really did was scream “Ohmygodohmygodohmygod” while shedding my clothes and running towards the shower. I’d say that at least I gave Lilian something to talk about with her therapist 20 years from now, but I’m just glad that she’s too young to remember any of this.
And, of course, once we were all cleaned up and feeling better, Lilian got sick again. Because of course.
Kids test a marriage. They take all the good things and the bad things and the tough things and they magnify them by about a bazillion percent. There are other ways to field test your marriage, of course, but I’m pretty sure that tag-teaming a toddler’s stomach virus/food poisoning and coming out on the other side relatively unscathed (relatively!) is a pretty damn good sign.
Lilian and I hunkered down for the day. She was still feeling kinda rotten, and I was still feeling completely and utterly shell-shocked. I can neither confirm nor deny that we watched Frozen. And Monsters U. And Monster Inc.
Not my best day of parenting, but it had been a loooooong ass morning. And it was nasty outside.
Luckily for us, Sunday was a much nicer day. And nobody felt like puking. (Not even a little bit!) I got up early with Lilian, took her to the store to get her out of the house (she likes to stand outside our door and yell “Ssssshhhh! Papa sleeping!”), and then we made waffles. With peach compote. And real whipped cream.
I…. am not a fast cook. Kristian woke up all on his own and came downstairs. Instead of breakfast in bed, he got breakfast on the couch. Close enough, right?
At least I didn’t burn his Father’s Day breakfast. This time.
(I…. am not a great cook either.)
Then we took a walk around the neighborhood. And there was too. much. cute.
Have I mentioned how amazing my husband is? Because it was Father‘s Day and I got to go paddle boarding. How does that work? I know it was nap time and everything. But damn. My husband is the bestest.
Lilian woke up from her nap and she and I went to watch my Dad play baseball. I don’t know if she appreciates the finer points of America’s Pastime, but she sure does love sitting in little, tiny, Lilian-sized chairs. And clapping. She sure does love clapping.
Then we went back home, where Kristian cooked everybody an amazing dinner. And my dad did all the dishes. Because Father’s Day was also Opposite Day this year? I don’t know, I just kinda went with it.
After our lovely little weekend, Kristian had to head out on a four day business trip. And that was… not so lovely.
Twelve hours on our own, and this happened:
That’s right, my kid picked a fight with the sidewalk. And the sidewalk kicked her ass. You don’t even want to know about the looks I got at daycare when I dropped her off the next day.
The worst part about solo parenting? It’s not that nobody else can help you out at 4am when your kid wakes up screaming. It’s that your kid is pretty much guaranteed to wake up at 4am screaming. Lilian loves her papa, and it was really rough on her to not have him around. Plus there was the whole face incident. And the vaccinations.
Did I not mention the vaccinations? Yeah, I took Lilian to her well child checkup the day Kristian left for his trip. That was… poor planning on my part. Exceptionally poor planning. It was a rough week for all of us.
I did hire a teenager from down the street to help me out a couple nights. She gave me an extra pair of hands at bath time and then stuck around so that I could give Gracie some nice long walks. I can handle most of the solo parenting duties ok (4am screaming and all), but there is just no way to give Gracie the long walks that she needs with a toddler in tow.
(Especially when said toddler tries to pick fights with the sidewalk).
(And wants to turn around after a half block or so).
Luckily, Kristian was back on Saturday. And everybody was happy.
Especially this little lady.
