What to Buy When You’re Expecting

A couple of people have asked me lately about what I’d recommend in terms of baby gear. Ok, ok, ok… a bunch of people I know are going to have babies in the not-so-distant future and I can’t shut up about baby gear. I figured I’d save them all my blathering and write up a blog post with my recommendations. A lot of this stuff comes down to personal preference, but I did do a bunch of research when we were figuring out what to get. I think I have some decent insights. For this post, I’ll stick with the big ticket items.

(All links are Amazon Affiliate links.)

(All opinions are my own.)

Safe Baby Sleeping Spot

Where your baby sleeps can be a pretty personal choice. Some babies sleep in cribs, some babies sleep in bassinets, some babies sleep with their parents. Finnish babies often sleep in official government cardboard boxes. You might not even know your preference until your baby shows up. I know moms who planned on having their baby sleep in a crib down the hall… until they realized they wanted to snuggle up together at night. And I know other moms who planned on co-sleeping until they realized just how badly their babies snored!

If you go with a crib, make sure you buy it new. I’m all for saving money, but safety standards have changed a lot in the last 10-20 years. A crib that’s missing assembly instructions and/or pieces is not such a great thing either. The good news is that, as long as you get it new, any crib is as good as another. They all have to meet those same standards. We picked ours up (along with a mattress) at Ikea. You could get yours at a discount furniture store. Or you could purchase some fancy, designer crib at a huge markup. Your pick. Personally, I can’t get behind spending a ton of cash on a piece of furniture that you’re only going to get about 18 months worth of use out of. But it really is just personal preference.

Our crib will convert into a toddler bed when Lilian is ready for it. It was pretty bare-bones in other ways, but we didn’t really need any of the bells and whistles that you can get. If you have back problems or can’t lift things well, you might want to spring for a crib that has a side that lowers down. Ours is fixed in place, so we have to reach down to get Lilian. I don’t mind, but maybe I would if my back wasn’t in great shape. It was also kind of a pain to lower the mattress when she started pulling herself to standing. But that was just a one-time event. I spent an hour or so with one of those little Ikea allen wrenches and then we didn’t have to worry about it again.

Another great option is a co-sleeper. They’re basically a side-car for your bed. They’re a bit spendy, though. And they have pretty firm weight/age limits, which means that you will likely need to get a crib as well. I was lucky enough to get one through a local consignment store, which was a pretty amazing stroke of luck. They’re almost impossible to find used.

(This might have something to do with the fact that they’re spendy and have a limited time-frame for their use.)

I loved the co-sleeper, because I could just roll over in the middle of the night, feed Lilian, and then go back to sleep. It was also lovely, when she was all tiny and small, to have her sleeping next to me so that I could soak it all in. And confirm that she was still breathing. Because new parents == paranoid. I also had done some research about the optimal place for a newborn to sleep, and the current thinking is that it’s great for them to be right next to you (because they key off of your breathing), but in their own little safe space.

You could also use a pack and play with a bassinet attachment. Or a plain old pack and play. Or a Finnish-style box. As long as it keeps them from rolling onto the floor, you can’t go too wrong.

Car Seat

Car seats are the other piece of baby gear that you’re not supposed to buy used. There are two reasons for this. They all have expiration dates (the plastics in them break down over time). You’re also supposed to replace them if they’ve been in any sort of accident. If you get a used car seat, you have no idea if it’s past its expiration date or if it’s been involved in a fender bender. Car seats protect your babies, and even the cheapest ones meet all the same safety standards. It’s just not a good idea to buy one used.

There are two kinds of car-seats: infant seats, and convertible seats. Infant seats look like padded buckets with big handles on them. They clip into bases that you install in your car. They’re basically the greatest thing ever. If you’re out and about, and your baby falls asleep in the car, you can just carry them into the house with you. Or, if they’re sleeping in the car, and you need to run into the grocery store (or liquor store, who am I to judge?), you can tote them in with you. Every time Lilian falls asleep in the car on the way home from daycare and I end up sitting in the driveway like a chump, I curse the fact that infant seats have weight limits.

What kind should you get? We have a Graco SnugRide. They’re one of the more popular models. Probably because they get great reviews. The nice thing about their popularity is, any sort of accessories are pretty much guaranteed to work with them. And they will clip into most strollers (more on that below). I’ve also heard good things about the Chicco KeyFit, although they’re a lot more expensive.

(Whatever you do, if you have more than one car, buy a second base for it.)

(You’ll thank me later.)

Once your baby gets too heavy or too long, you’ll need to put them in a rear-facing convertible carseat. We have a Britax Marathon. We were lucky enough to get it as a group gift. We also have a Graco My Ride that we bought to put in Kristian’s car. Now, we don’t have to do the carseat shuffle every day. Worth it! What do you get with a more expensive carseat? For the most part, comfort for your baby, and an easier time for you to install it. If you have the money to spend, I think it’s probably worth it. Wrestling a toddler into the back of your car can be difficult enough. Why make life harder by getting a carseat that requires the strength of Andre the Giant to get properly buckled? But, all the seats have to meet the same safety standards. So there’s no need to go spending crazy money on a carseat if you don’t want to.

Stroller

Of all the big-ticket items, strollers come down the most to personal preference. There are lots of great strollers out there, so the best stroller for you depends on how you’re planning on using it. We have a Bumbleride Flite , which works great for our suburban (sob!) lifestyle. It folds up small, and it’s super light. Perfect for taking in and out of the car. It even has a convenient carrying handle on the side. I wouldn’t recommend it, however, if you were planning on taking it to walk and do errands/buy groceries. I can’t even fit my diaper bag in the basket underneath it. You’re not supposed to use your baby as a counter-weight, so an ultra-compact/ultra-light stroller is not a good choice if you plan on loading it up with potatoes from the farmers market.

We also looked at the Baby Jogger City Mini and the UPPAbaby Cruz. I didn’t like the Baby Jogger, because you can’t actually jog with it. What can I say? I’m a literalist. And maybe a little OCD. If it says jogger in the name, you should be able to jog with it. Pass. The UPPAbaby was just a little too space age (and expensive!) for us. We live in a working class neighborhood, we wanted a stroller that looks like an actual stroller. There’s no need to make the neighbors think we’re any weirder than they already do. I also didn’t like all the wrangling you had to do in order to fold and unfold it. But, mostly it was just way more than we wanted to spend on a stroller.

Whatever you do, go to a store and try strollers out. You can learn a lot from online reviews, but they’re no replacement for pushing the stroller yourself and seeing what it feels like. We went to a local baby store and took a few different models for a spin. They had a ramp and some uneven surfaces to try it on. They even had (creepy, creepy, OMG creepy) weighted dolls that you can use to get a better idea of what it will be like to push a baby in one. We also folded and unfolded all of the strollers to see how easy it would be.

(I attempted to buy the stroller from the brick and mortar store that was nice enough to let us try it out, but they pretty much made it impossible to get the stroller that we wanted in the color that we wanted. So Amazon it was.)

No matter what stroller you choose, I would highly recommend getting an adaptor so that you can strap your infant carseat to it. That way, when your baby is tiny and new and sleeping up to 17 hours a day, you can take them pretty much anywhere without waking them up. Our stroller came with the adaptor bar, which is one of the reasons that we chose it. It’s also why picking a more popular infant seat can be a good idea. Most of the stroller manufacturers bars will be designed to work with your carseat.

Oh, and try and get a cup holder. It seems like such a First World Problem to need a cupholder on your stroller. And, really, it is. But you are going to be drinking a lot of coffee.

If you’re going to get a jogging stroller, you should definitely buy it used. Jogging strollers on Craigslist are a dime a dozen. They’re pretty much the opposite of co-sleepers. Why? Because jogging strollers are the ultimate aspirational item. People buy them with grand plans of using them all the time, but then they let them sit around gathering dust and eventually sell them used.

I have a BOB Ironman, which has a fixed wheel, making it the best option for heavy/intense running. Basically, if the front wheel of your stroller isn’t locked in place, you don’t want to jog with it. BOB also makes the Revolution which has a pin that locks the front wheel in place when you’re running. The pin can then be unlocked for better maneuverability when you’re walking around. Personally, I wanted a regular stroller for walking around and the real deal for running. Once again, blah blah personal choice blah.

Soft Carrier

Soft carriers are so awesome, we own three. A Moby Wrap is great for when they’re tiny and want to sleep all snuggled up on you. A Babybjorn is great if you’re my husband and want something easy to buckle on that doesn’t look super frouffy. An ERGObaby is great for carrying your baby when they get bigger, and for longer distances. I use mine to take LJ on all sorts of adventures, like snowshoeing. One caveat with the baby bjorn is that they’re not good for longer periods of time, both for the sake of your back and your baby’s hips. They are, however, excellent for a quick walk around the block with the dog.

Pro tip: if you’ll be walking around with your baby in the winter, get an over-sized coat. You can zip it up around the two of you. Give baby a hat, and they’ll stay super cozy and warm. I bought a cheap-o down coat at Target and we got a lot of use out of it. The neighbors got a big kick out of watching us walk around with a little baby head sticking out of our chests!

Baby Jail

A Pack N Play is useful in so many different ways. You can use them as a portable sleeping spot when you’re traveling. You can even use them instead of a crib at home, if that’s how you roll. Today, we are using ours as an auxiliary crib because Lilian puked all over her regular crib. But the best use for one? A safe place where you can stash your recently mobile baby while you use the bathroom. Anything that enables you to keep your baby safe while you answer nature’s call is a good thing in my book. I think there are other play yards out there, but the Pack and Play is pretty damn popular. Whatever play yard you get, you should make sure that it’s easy to setup and put away, that it’s not too heavy, and that it folds up nice and small. I think they all fit that criteria. Pick up a couple sheets for yours (they use a different size than crib sheets) and you’re all set.

That’s all I can think of for now. Let me know if you have any questions! Or if you think I got any of these horribly wrong.