I Have Low Blood Sugar, Hear Me Roar

The next person who requires me to go to a four-hour meeting, spanning lunchtime and who doesn’t feed me is going to get punched in the face. Repeatedly.

Depending on wether or not I have a snack in my purse, I also might be throwing in some groin kicks. Gratis. Because I am nice like that.

No jury in the world would convict me. All it would take would be one person on the panel with blood sugar issues and they’d be falling all over themselves to acquit. They’d probably vote to give me a medal. And then ask when we were breaking for lunch.

Let this be a lesson to you, would-be meeting planners of the world. If you a) would like me to attend and 2) dislike being punched in the face, check your calendars carefully. If your session falls during breakfast, lunch, brunch, elevenses, second breakfast, tea time, dinner, supper, lupper or involves me thinking a lot… please provide snacks. And the appropriate meal. Just to be safe, I would just go ahead and provide some snacks.

Because, let’s face it, I’m not going to be all that productive when all I can think is

FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME HUNGRY HUNGRY FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME HUNGRY HUNGRY FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME HUNGRY FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME

You have been warned.