Hi! My name is Julian! I’m only a week old and I already have my own gmail account. That’s what an awesome baby I am. I am seven pounds of concentrated awesome.
My parents’ friends Hope and Kristian visited me for the first time last night.
They brought pizza and peanut-butter cheesecake. Which is kindof rude. Because, hello. I am a small, squishy baby and won’t be eating such delicious things for something like a year. Which, in baby time is like seven centuries. And then they ate it in front of me. Don’t even get me started on how obnoxious that was.
I think that the curly haired one dropped some crumbs on my head.
Bitch.
My parents are pretty cool, though. My Dad likes to point at me and laugh. I have no idea why.
I’m sure that it has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that I look like a small Winston Churchill. Do I look like a guy who would go to war with Germany? I don’t even know where Germany is on a map yet! I don’t even know what maps are yet! I try to point this out to him, but all he says is, “What’s wrong little guy? Are you hungry? Do you need to have your diaper changed?”
These times are trying for a baby such as myself.
I like this one. She lets me open my own presents. I believe that her name is Mom. Possibly Mommy. Maybe Christina. These adult humans are very confusing in their nomenclature.
Oh boy. A quilt.
I am so going to spit up on that later.
To see more pictures of me and all of my awesomeness, please click here.
