{"id":929,"date":"2009-01-29T19:37:17","date_gmt":"2009-01-30T00:37:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/?p=929"},"modified":"2009-01-29T19:37:17","modified_gmt":"2009-01-30T00:37:17","slug":"a-natural-disaster-of-culinary-proportions","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/a-natural-disaster-of-culinary-proportions\/","title":{"rendered":"A Natural Disaster of Culinary Proportions"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I&#8217;ve decided that one of my new life rules is to avoid eating any foods that have catastrophic names. That means that <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Steak_bomb\">steak bombs<\/a>&#8230; are out. <a href=\"http:\/\/www.nutritiondata.com\/facts\/foods-from-dairy-queen\/6668\/2\">Dairy Queen Blizzards<\/a>&#8230; are out. <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Molten_chocolate_cake\">Molten chocolate cake<\/a>&#8230; is possibly out. I mean, the sheer amount of delicious, delicious chocolate should probably give it a pass. Plus, metal is molten and there&#8217;s nothing disastrous about that.<\/p>\n<p>Lava on the other hand&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>But I digress. A lot. This is what happens when you write up a blog post while anxiously waiting for Kristian to finish dinner (I offered to help! I swear! He felt bad about the three hours that I spent commuting today! He&#8217;s just nice like that! I&#8217;m not really dead weight in the cooking department! I swear!).<\/p>\n<p>So, if disastrous foods are out, that certainly eliminates the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.bbqaddicts.com\/blog\/recipes\/bacon-explosion\/\">Bacon Explosion<\/a>. Which would probably be eliminated by my cardiologist. If I had a cardiologist. Which I don&#8217;t. Because I&#8217;m only 27 years old. And I don&#8217;t eat things like the Bacon Explosion.<\/p>\n<p>Oh, yes, the Bacon Explosion. Bacon wrapped in sausage. Wrapped in more bacon. Covered in BBQ sauce. Admittedly, it sounds rather tasty. Tasty like a heart attack.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>A tasty, tasty heart attack.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I&#8217;ve decided that one of my new life rules is to avoid eating any foods that have catastrophic names. That means that steak bombs&#8230; are out. Dairy Queen Blizzards&#8230; are&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[19],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-929","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-the-great-blog-off"],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p5yggS-eZ","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/929","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=929"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/929\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":930,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/929\/revisions\/930"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=929"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=929"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=929"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}