{"id":3913,"date":"2014-06-09T12:00:13","date_gmt":"2014-06-09T16:00:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/?p=3913"},"modified":"2014-06-08T21:26:42","modified_gmt":"2014-06-09T01:26:42","slug":"it-was-bound-to-happen-eventually","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/it-was-bound-to-happen-eventually\/","title":{"rendered":"It Was Bound to Happen Eventually&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><em>Act I Scene I: Bright and early on a Saturday morning. A bleary-eyed Hope is unloading the dishwasher while her daughter &#8220;helps.&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n<p>LJ: Mama! [points]<\/p>\n<p><em>The dishwasher pod is still sitting in the dishwasher. The dishwasher ran all the way through, but no soap was dispensed. Hope has just put away half a dishwasher worth of dirty dishes.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Hope: Fuck!<\/p>\n<p>LJ: Fuck! Fuck fuck fuck! Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!<\/p>\n<p>Hope: (<em>inwardly<\/em>) Fuuuuuuuuuuuck.<\/p>\n<p>[<em>End Scene.<\/em>]<\/p>\n<p><em>Act I Scene II: Later on that same day, LJ drops her water bottle on the ground.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Kristian: Did she just say fuck?<\/p>\n<p>Hope: Uhhhhhhhh&#8230;. let me tell you a little story&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>[fin.]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Act I Scene I: Bright and early on a Saturday morning. A bleary-eyed Hope is unloading the dishwasher while her daughter &#8220;helps.&#8221; LJ: Mama! [points] The dishwasher pod is still&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[54,2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3913","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-lj","category-random"],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p5yggS-117","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3913","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3913"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3913\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3914,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3913\/revisions\/3914"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3913"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3913"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3913"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}