{"id":2509,"date":"2011-01-26T14:46:12","date_gmt":"2011-01-26T19:46:12","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/?p=2509"},"modified":"2011-01-26T14:46:12","modified_gmt":"2011-01-26T19:46:12","slug":"jobs-in-another-life","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/jobs-in-another-life\/","title":{"rendered":"Jobs in Another Life"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>For the most part, I&#8217;m pretty happy with my current profession (classroom support). I get to use my brain in interesting ways while saving most of my creative energy for my <a href=\"http:\/\/beerandpie.hoperoth.com\/\">music<\/a>. Plus, I get to go to the gym on my lunch break. But, sometimes, I like to daydream about other professions. Professions that I&#8217;m not qualified for. Professions that I will never be qualified for. Professions that I should have started pursuing about 10-15 years ago.<\/p>\n<p>When I was little, I was sure that I&#8217;d grow up to be an astronaut-ballerina-firefighter. Because, who wouldn&#8217;t want to pirouette while dousing flames on the moon?<\/p>\n<p>These are the jobs that I sometimes daydream about:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>Sportscaster<\/strong>. And I&#8217;m not talking sideline reporter. Anyone can wear a cute hat and tell the guys in the studio that such-and-such team is &#8220;really excited&#8221; about the big game. I want to be one of the people in the studio talking strategy and discussing the games at length. I think I&#8217;d be good at it. And, if necessary, I <em>do<\/em> own some rather cute hats.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Journalist<\/strong>. Too bad newspapers are dying. Maybe I should become an online journalist. One with no ethics, which basically just means making stuff up on my blog. Speaking of which, did you know that sources confirm that John Boehner was born a crocodile? It&#8217;s why he cries so much. (NB: sources are me).<\/li>\n<li><strong>Veterinarian<\/strong>. Of course, I&#8217;d probably have to spend all my time taking stool samples, putting animals down and lecturing people about letting their pets become morbidly obese. On the plus side, puppies!<\/li>\n<li><strong>Flight Attendant<\/strong>. Free travel? Check. Cute uniform? Check. Plentiful peanuts? Check. Too bad I&#8217;m scared of flying. And drunk businessmen.<\/li>\n<li><strong>CEO of a major corporation<\/strong>. I think I could get used to bossing people around. Plus, even if I screwed up, they&#8217;d give me a ginormous golden parachute. Which I could use to pursue my dream of becoming the world&#8217;s first astronaut-ballerina-firefighter.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>How about you? What&#8217;s your dream job? If you could have any job in the world, what would it be?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>For the most part, I&#8217;m pretty happy with my current profession (classroom support). I get to use my brain in interesting ways while saving most of my creative energy for&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2509","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-random"],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p5yggS-Et","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2509","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2509"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2509\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2510,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2509\/revisions\/2510"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2509"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2509"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2509"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}