{"id":1555,"date":"2009-09-11T13:53:53","date_gmt":"2009-09-11T18:53:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/?p=1555"},"modified":"2009-09-11T13:53:53","modified_gmt":"2009-09-11T18:53:53","slug":"dear-people-you-suck","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/dear-people-you-suck\/","title":{"rendered":"Dear People: You Suck"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Dear Person Who Flipped Me Off <em>While Cutting Me Off<\/em> This Morning:<\/p>\n<p>You suck. I hope that the next person you pull this on decides (unlike me) to speed up instead of brake. Way to set an example for your two little kids in the back seat. And just remember, BMW repairs are expensive. Keys are cheap. I&#8217;m not threatening. I&#8217;m just saying, is all.<\/p>\n<p>Signed,<br \/>\nLittle Miss Road Rage<\/p>\n<p>To My Morning Bus Driver:<\/p>\n<p>I must admit, I am having a difficult time figuring out how you manage to alternate being five minutes early with ten minutes late. Either way, you&#8217;ve inspired me to drive a lot more often. Global Warming will kill us all AND IT&#8217;S ALL YOUR FAULT. Get a watch and learn how to use it. Think of the polar bears. Won&#8217;t somebody think of the polar bears?!?<\/p>\n<p>Signed,<br \/>\nLittle Miss Almost Late For Work<\/p>\n<p>Dear 87% of the Female Students at this Fine University:<\/p>\n<p>No matter how much you want them to be,<em> <\/em><em>leggings are not pants<\/em>. Nobody wants to know \u00a0the exact shape of your ass. Trust me on this one. Although I do have to give you props for making me feel better about my cellulite.<\/p>\n<p>Signed,<br \/>\nYours Sincerely, Get off of My Lawn<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Dear Person Who Flipped Me Off While Cutting Me Off This Morning: You suck. I hope that the next person you pull this on decides (unlike me) to speed up&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[3,2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1555","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-grumble","category-random"],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p5yggS-p5","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1555","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1555"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1555\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1556,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1555\/revisions\/1556"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1555"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1555"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1555"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}