{"id":1174,"date":"2009-03-10T13:54:33","date_gmt":"2009-03-10T18:54:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/?p=1174"},"modified":"2009-03-10T13:54:33","modified_gmt":"2009-03-10T18:54:33","slug":"cmon-get-happy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/cmon-get-happy\/","title":{"rendered":"C’mon Get Happy"},"content":{"rendered":"

This mid-afternoon post is brought to you by the fact that our email system, Exchange, is currently down and has been ALL FREAKING DAY. Who knew that I wouldn’t much be able to do my job without any email? Oh right, I<\/em> knew that. Although, this whole not being able to do any real work thing is kindof not bad. A girl could get used to this.<\/p>\n

Anyways, we went out for lunch today. And, because there was literally no other\u00a0restaurant\u00a0for me to eat at, I ended up getting a Happy Meal from McDonalds. Yeah, yeah, evil empire, transfats, poor dead cows and whatnot. I was hungry<\/em>.\u00a0<\/p>\n

The McEmployee and I had the following conversation:<\/p>\n

McGuy<\/strong>: Is this for a boy or a girl?
\nHope’s Brain<\/strong>: Ok, so we’re going to pretend that this isn’t for me.
\nHope<\/strong>: What’s the difference?
\nMcGuy<\/strong>: The toy
\nHope<\/strong>: Ok, what’s the toy difference?
\nMcGuy<\/strong>: Boys get Spiderman, girls get Polly Pocket.
\nHope<\/strong>: Ok, it’s for a little boy.<\/p>\n

So, at this point, my pants were thoroughly on fire. Not only had I subtracted about 20 years from my age. I’d also completely changed my gender. Breaking down barriers, it’s what I’m all about.<\/p>\n

But you know what, McDonalds? I don’t think that boys should get Spiderman toys while girls get stuck with Polly Pocket. Maybe instead of asking “boy or girl,” the pimply faced teenager waiting on me should have asked “awesome toy or crappy toy?” Then I could have had my Spiderman that shoots webs at your coworkers <\/em>(seriously, how cool is that?) without having to lie.<\/p>\n

I’m putting you on notice, McDonalds. You might have other people convinced that you’ve changed with your yogurt parfaits and your salads and your healthy Happy Meal choices (like any 7-year-old is going to choose apple slices over french fries). But, I see right through you. It’s the Barbie for girls, Hot Wheels for boys scenario all over again. And, you know what? Those Barbies sucked<\/em>. I asked for Hot Wheels. But, noooo. You’re a girl, you will take your crappy Barbie toy and YOU WILL LIKE IT.<\/p>\n

Not bitter. Soooo not bitter.<\/p>\n

We only got to eat like one Happy Meal a decade. The rest of the time it was homemade oatmeal and tofu. And you know what tofu comes with? A whole lot of water and NO HAPPY MEAL TOY.<\/p>\n

The Hot Wheels toys were real mini cars. Barbie was four inches tall and you couldn’t even move her legs.<\/p>\n

Totally not bitter. Completely and utterly not bitter.<\/p>\n

Anyways, I could write up a whole manifesto about how it is now two thousand freaking nine and why are we still forcing our kids into gender roles. Hey McDonalds, the 1950’s called and they want their stereotypes back. But, enh. It’s McDonalds. I’m not even sure why I was eating there in the first place (oh yeah, I was hungry<\/em>).<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This mid-afternoon post is brought to you by the fact that our email system, Exchange, is currently down and has been ALL FREAKING DAY. Who knew that I wouldn’t much…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[3,20,2,19],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1174","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-grumble","category-hopeless-idealist","category-random","category-the-great-blog-off"],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p5yggS-iW","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1174","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1174"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1174\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1175,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1174\/revisions\/1175"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1174"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1174"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hoperoth.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1174"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}