Yesterday was the one year anniversary of our move to France. I didn’t even realize it until Lilian pointed the date out to me. It feels like the past year just flew on by, but also like we’ve been here for a lifetime. People ask me all the time if I’m glad that we moved, but that’s a complicated question. If I could wave a magic wand and decide if we should do this or not, I’d still make the same decision. But, I’d know that it wasn’t always going to be easy. I mean, we always knew that it wasn’t going to be easy. But there’s a difference between knowing and knowing.
I knew that I’d miss my friends, but I didn’t realize how lonely I’d be until we started to really get to know people. I also didn’t factor in how hard it is to keep in touch with people when you’re 6+ hours ahead of them.
I knew that I might have to give up my job, but I didn’t realize how stressful the not knowing was going to be. In the end, I had to walk away from a position that I well and truly loved. I won’t say dream job (I don’t dream of labor), but it really was perfect for me. I got to be both a programmer and a content creator. I loved the combination of technical and creative and I’m not sure how to find something like that again. I’ve started my own freelancing business, and I’m trying to find offerings that are that same blend.
We signed Lilian up for one more year of school, so we’re in it for another year. I’m looking forward to more adventures, deeper ties to the local community, and spending this fall with both feet firmly planted in French soil (last fall, I travelled back and forth from the US for work).
Some Highlights From the Past Year
Learning (More) French
It’s funny how your skills can slowly improve over time without you even noticing. I didn’t think my French had changed that much, but multiple native French speakers have told me in the past month that they’ve noticed a difference. My language is more fluid, and I’m more confident about speaking. I think I’m understanding things better, although I still get lost if people speak fast (the default mode of most French speakers) or use a lot of slang.
Getting better at French is one of those things that builds on itself. I can practice more if I’m not forced to switch to English. I’m not quite ready to start consuming all of my media in French, but I can watch a TV show or a movie in French (with French subtitles turned on). This fall, I’ll be participating in two “formations” (training programs) that will be all in French. I anticipate quite a few little headaches in my future!
One thing that’s helped my vocabulary and grammar immensely is taking (free!) language classes at a nearby university. Kristian and I both go, although he’s been much better about finding the time to bike over. The classes are all drop-in, which makes it much easier to fit them into our busy schedules. They’re run by the university students, and they’re geared towards helping immigrants improve their French and learn about French culture. We usually read a piece of literature or watch a clip from a film. Then, we learn vocabulary about a particular topic, work on verb conjugation, and practice a bit of pronunciation. The classes are hugely popular, however, so we don’t get a lot of time to practice speaking. For that, I guess we just need our day-to-day living. Also, one of the student teachers loves having us read ancient poetry, which always cracks me up.
Discovering an Aerial Home
I joked with Kristian that he was really looking out for me when he found an apartment that’s just down the street from an aerial/pole studio. But it has truly been amazing! When I left my job, I signed up for 6 months of unlimited classes. I figured I’d have a lot of free time on my hands. I made great use of the opportunity. I got measurably stronger these past 6 months! More importantly, I made new friends and found a real sense of community. This fall, I’m taking a teacher training program (formation) there.
Making New Friends
Lilian was worried about how she was going to make all-new friends, but it’s actually pretty easy when you go to an international school. It’s a lot harder when you’re a grownup who doesn’t go to an office. It took some time to find our people, but I’m really starting to feel like part of a community here. We’ve got a lovely little Sunday evening tradition of having dinner with two other families. We also have a regular board-game night. And, right now, I’m helping a friend put together the website/social media for an English-language cultural cafe.
We were lucky enough to meet a friend of a friend when we first got here. I think it’s safe to say that she’s now a friend. She’s been invaluable in answering our questions and helping us understand some of the more confusing aspects of life here. She made me breakfast on my birthday last year, which went a long way in helping me feel less home/friend-sick. Also, she reads a lot of my blog entries (hi!), which helps me feel better to know that I haven’t completely misunderstood French culture.
We also got to know some of our neighbors! We have one neighbor who’s had us over for dinner a couple of times (including one very appreciated dinner when Kristian and Lilian were in the US and I was feeling super lonely). We even had a potluck dinner in the courtyard of our apartment building. It takes a long time to get to know people here, but it’s that much more rewarding when you start to build up those social ties.
We joined the American Club in order to attend their 4th of July picnic. There are also quite a few WhatsApp groups for English speakers and expats. I try not to spend all of my time in Anglophone spaces, but it’s also important to make time for friends that you can easily communicate with!
Hosting Visitors
Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver and the other’s gold.
One of the hardest things about this year has been moving so far away from friends and family. Our apartment has a guest room and I’ve delighted in playing host to everyone who comes our way. I’ve also made a few trips up to Paris to see friends who were passing through.
Consider this your sign to let me know if you’ll be in France… you’d be surprised at how easy it is for me to meet up with you!
It’s truly eye opening to see your life through the lens of visitors. Little things really stick out. My dad, for example, spent his entire trip taking photos of all of the doors here in Lyon. I didn’t appreciate how beautiful they all are until then.
I’ve loved sharing our city with everybody who comes our way. I think I’ve got a real knack for figuring out what people will enjoy and making the arrangements. I’ve got a half-baked dream to get certified as a French guide (although, my goodness, it’s a herculean process) and make a business of it.
Traveling Around Europe
(I wrote about some of these trips already, but I also have a backlog of things to write about).
We wanted Lilian to see how great it is to live somewhere with abundant public transportation and easy borders. So, we made a point of traveling as much as we could. Lilian went to a different country on each of her school vacations. And, my word, French schoolchildren get a lot of vacation breaks.
In October, I went to Ghent, Belgium for work. This was the smallest/shortest of our trips, but a perfect introduction to train travel. As in, just how much nicer it is to take the train. I flew there, but Lilian and Kristian took the TGV. I think it took us about the same amount of time (once you factor in getting to the airport early, etc) and their journey was much more comfortable. I spent most of the trip working, but they were able to see some of the sights.
Over New Years, we went to Munich, Germany to meet up with friends. This was Lilian’s first chance to see how cool her life is through the eyes of a kid from back home. I think it marked a real transitional moment for us. She really engaged with her French classes after she went back to school in January.
In February, I went to a trade show in Barcelona, Spain and then the whole family met up with me and we visited friends in Madrid. Barcelona is always going to have a special place in my heart, because it’s the city where we decided to give European living a try. It felt like a real milestone to go back as a European resident!
I should really go back and do a post-hoc post about Madrid, because it was incredible. Our friend were so warm and welcoming, and we did a bunch of really cool stuff. Highlights included playing in all sorts of cool parks, visiting the Prado, and watching a protest that featured hundreds of tractors.
In April, I got left behind (I can’t leave the Schengen Area until I get my French paperwork), and Kristian and Lilian went to London and Scotland. I told them they needed to post something about their trip, but nobody ever wants to take the time. I do know that they had an amazing time with friends in London, got to see some friends from back home while in Edinburgh, and had an otherworldly visit to the Isle of Skye.
In May, I went back to Barcelona to meet up with family. This is another one that I really need to write about, because I had a fantastic time wandering around the city with my step-mom. I loved having a chance to play tourist for a few days, and Pam is a great travel companion. We had a super chill visit.
In July, we spent a weekend in Lausanne, Switzerland to see some friends. I wrote about this one as well, but with the distance of time, I can confirm that lake swimming is the absolute best. Every time we have a heatwave (and that’s pretty much all the time, these days), I dream of jumping into a cool lake and gazing up at the mountains.
Traveling Around France
Fun fact: you don’t have to leave France to have a good time. We took quite a few trips around France to see friends/family and to try new things.
Our first foray outside the Lyon area was a day trip to Aix-Les-Bains. We had such a fun time, we went back when my sister and niece visited us in June. I think my favorite moment of that first day trip was sitting on the return train, eating sandwiches and peanut butter puffs, and having some drinks. It was so cozy to sit all together, instead of being in a car.
Lilian had a bunch of free time during her October break, so she and I took an impromptu trip to Grenoble. We won a free pastry box as part of an Instagram contest, which we used as an excuse to go back as a family. Highlights included taking a cablecar up to the fort, visiting the art museum there (it’s small, but it has one or two paintings from lots of famous painters), and checking out all of the street art.
We spent a day in Pérouges when it was still pretty chilly out. It was perfect weather for eating galettes (a local pastry that’s a bit like a sweet flatbread with brown sugar and butter on it) and drinking mulled wine. We also went back in May when my family was visiting. Pérouges is a medieval city that’s somehow managed to become a tourist attraction while still retaining real local character. I feel like most cities that get that many tourbuses would have tchotchkes and t-shirt stands as far as the eye can see. Instead there are little shops run by local artisans. Even getting there is fun, with a quick trip on the train and then a walk through the French countryside. We went back with family and enjoyed wandering around with them.
We spent a Saturday in Vienne, which is host to the largest outdoor market in France. We climbed the big hill there and took in a view of the entire valley. We also took a wander by their roman ruins. They host a jazz festival in the amphitheater there every year. We weren’t able to make it to any of the concerts this year, but it’s definitely on the list for next time!
I made multiple trips to Paris this year to see friends and family. I pride myself on being a good Paris buddy. It’s so easy to get there (a little under 2 hours on the TGV), that I don’t feel the need to do all the things. Instead, I go along with whatever my fellow travelers want to do. You want to take a boat tour? Let’s take a boat tour. You want to go to museums? I love museums. You want to eat crepes in a café while people watching? Sounds fantastic!
I even speak enough French that occasionally a Parisian waiter will deign to continue speaking it with me. Which I think is quite fun.
(Have I mentioned that you should really invite me to join you on your next French vacation?)
A friend and I made a pilgrimage to Provence to take in the lavender fields. We were a little on the early side for peak lavender, but we still had an amazing day. At one point, we turned to each other and said at the same time, “is this real life?” The French countryside is a bit of a cliché for a darn good reason.
While Kristian and Lilian were in Scotland, I got all in my feelings about them going back to the US for three weeks without me. I decided that I needed a mini vacation of my own. So, I impulse-booked an Airbnb in Marseille that ended up being the perfect great decision. The weather was probably just as hot as it would have been back here in Lyon, but I got to swim in the Mediterranean every day that I was there. I was staying in a room in my hosts’ apartment, so I got plenty of family time (just not my family).
I was so happy when they came back home!
To celebrate Lilian’s birthday, we spent last weekend in Talloires. It was a special trip for us, because Talloires is the place that brought Kristian and me together (more on that in a future post). It didn’t hurt that the weather was perfect, and that we got to do more lake swimming. Lilian went paragliding, which means that I literally let her jump off of a mountain. She had so much fun, she’s going to save up all of her babysitting money for a chance to go back and take classes there.
Here’s to Another Year!
Hopefully, I gave you a decent feeling for what it’s been like. I’d say it’s been about 8 parts amazing to 2 parts difficult. I’ll take those numbers! I don’t want to complain about “oh, poor me, I live in France now, wa wa let me cry into this croissant.” But I also don’t want to pretend that it’s been 100% sunshine and roses. Life is never all good or all bad, right? On the whole, it’s been pretty amazing. I’m looking forward to more travels, more visitors (getting the hint yet?), making more friends, taking part in two formations…
Oh, yeah, and eating more croissants.
Happy August, everyone! Here’s to another great year.
